For me valentine’s day was yet another one of those man-made days that only smug happy couples could participate in, it was a time to remind me about what I didn’t have in life, no husband, no partner and very little family around. Wow, no wonder I always felt so depressed and low, I just never appreciated what I did have in life and only seemed to focus on what I didn’t have, every day was drudgery whether it was valentines or any other man-made occasion. these occasions just seem to be another opportunity for me to wholly in my own self-pity and I dreaded them.
Yes, I’m single, but I have two lovely boys who I love deeply and are my entire world and the love that I feel for them doesn’t compare to anything else or anyone else.
For those of you who may be feeling alone and spending the day comparing yourself to happy couples celebrating this day, ask yourself this question, what do you have that you love in your life that you are so incredibly grateful for? If you’ve never looked at life in this way before it can seem alien at first but stick with me here.
I woke this morning to a freezing cold bedroom and I could hear the rain outside hammering against the old house that I live in, that in places is falling apart! there are no valentines cards being delivered to me today and one might think that this is a good reason to retreat and feel sorry for oneself, however as I lay there in my cold bedroom I felt so grateful for my electric blanket that had kept me warm all night with undisturbed sleep and I remember thinking to myself, ‘I love this blanket’ and then the list grew because I practice gratitude on a daily basis, mainly because it makes me feel great and empowered rather than low, trapped and isolated.
Then my 14-year-old son gave me a valentine’s card, Wow he’s never done that before, I love my son so much. I turned on the heating and lit the wood burner, I love my wood burner and how it keeps us so warm.
During the cold winter we’ve spent many weekends and evenings snuggled up to the woodburner when the electric has gone off, but we’ve still been warm because we had the burner, I really love it and I’m so grateful for it. I got dressed and put my lovely thick woolly jumper on, I love this jumper and how snuggly it feels, I’m so grateful that I have such nice things to wear that keep me warm, then I let my little dog out in the garden to run around, she didn’t like the wind and rain and so was very quick and just ran back in the house so fast that she skidded across the hall way whcih made me laugh, she always makes me smile and I love her so much, then I wrote this blog on my lap top, I love my laptop and am so grateful for it, because I can reach out to others with love and show them that there is more to valentine's day than just having a partner and that the most important thing is that you love yourself and every aspect of your life and appreciate it, when you do this everyday and not just on valentines day your life will change, and before you know it you are coming from a place of love everyday and not fear and lack.
how many things do you love in your life right now, your home, your health, your family, your children, your car so you can get around, your legs so that you can walk, your phone so you can keep in touch with friends, your income wherever it comes from, your life, your house, your bed. The point is, there is more to be grateful for and love than you may actually think.